Lots of people assume I have always been this weight and it comes naturally to me. They assume that I have never had to work hard for my body and I've never struggled with my weight. Well let me tell you, they gotta it all wrong...
|Feeling healthy and happy|
I don't share this with a lot of people because it's a thing of the past but I want to be open and true with my clients and let them know that I've been in their shoes before, I want to share my journey through weight loss with you all.
When I was around 5 years old I was super tiny and a healthy kid. I was always outside and wanting to go go go. My family always had to drag me inside from playing. From the age 10-12 I started putting on more and more weight. I believe it was caused by a number of factors. Moving to a new school, staying inside more/less active and be self conscious of the weight I had put on. There were days when I would go out to the playground and kids would tease me about being fat. At the time it didn't really hurt me but it's one of those moments that gets drilled into your brain for the rest of your life. My eating habits didn't help and my family didn't know much about nutrition. We ate meat and potatoes or pasta. Always with a bun or bread on the side. I became a big snacker too.
The summer before I went into high school, I decided to start walking every where instead of taking the bus or asking for a ride. I was back to being outside and active again like I was when I was 5. Without even meaning to, the weight started to slide off. When I went back to school everyone noticed and commented. It felt great to be complemented. Like monkey see - monkey do = I started paying attention to what my mom was saying about dieting and keeping up with the latest diet fads in magazines. I started to try diets, running and working out. It became natural to worry about what I was eating and how my body looked. I kept a pretty standard weight during high school but had poor eating habits. I would sometimes only have a slurpee for lunch because it was what I was craving and I didn't want to eating anything else as I was afraid of gaining weight.
The year after high school I became clinically depressed. I felt lost in life, my family became healthy so I no longer could be the care giver and I had a poisonous relationship with my boyfriend that I could not give up. I became very vulnerable and insecure. It didn't help that my boyfriend at the time was lets say "not so great" and more attracted to other girls. Feeling like I wasn't good enough (physically), I started to control my weight intensely. There wasn't a certain point when I began my deadly downwards spiral. Slowly I became anorexic. I started to lie to family and friends that I was perfectly fine and I was eating. Truth was, I wasn't okay. My lowest weight was 108lbs - 113lbs and I'm 5'8. I would eat one piece of fruit in the morning and a snack at night. I would also run or walk for 30min everyday. I stepped on the scale 3 times a day. I was obsessed and it was something I could control when I felt like I had no control over anything in life at that time. I was also receiving lots of attention, so it felt good and I couldn't see anything wrong. I look back now and I can say I looked so unhealthy and unattractive.
|At my unhealthy lowest weight|
I never went for help for my anorexia directly but I had gone to a naturopath for my depression. He had found that I was allergic to several common foods and I had a brain allergy to sugar. Once I had something new to focus my attention on and something to control, I slowly returned to a healthy weight. I gained a new interest in health and nutrition and started learn about how the food we eat tremendously affects how our brain functions and our bodies feel.
With my knowledge of health and fitness I now maintain a healthy weight and am not afraid to step on a scale. I understand that a healthy combination of mind, body and soul can bring happiness to your life. There's been times when my weight fluctuates due to stress or something in my life being out of balance. I've learnt how to reflect and make corrections. I love the way I feel inside and out when I'm eating healthy, working out and my life is in balance for me.
I want to help people feel alive and healthy!
Have you ever dealt with weight issues?